Newspapers

[eldar]

Prompted by a conversation I had in the pub yesterday lunchtime, here's a classic quote from Yes, Prime Minister:

Jim Hacker: "Don't tell me about the press. I know exactly who reads the papers:
- The Daily Mirror is read by people who think they run the country;
- The Guardian is read by people who think they ought to run the country;
- The Times is read by people who actually do run the country;
- The Daily Mail is read by the wives of the people who run the country;
- The Financial Times is read by people who own the country;
- The Morning Star is read by people who think the country ought to be run by another country;
- And the Daily Telegraph is read by people who think it is."
Sir Humphrey: "Prime Minister, what about the people who read the Sun?"
Bernard Woolley: "Sun readers don't care who runs the country, as long as she's got big tits."

Now how would we update this for this day and age? Swap The Guardian and The Times to start with. And the Morning Star is something of an anachronism these days....

Any thoughts among my readership (assuming there still is one)?